Domestication: not a talent but a skill

Just because you are a mother doesnt mean all of a sudden domestication becomes natural. I was never warned that I would become an expert on stain removal or a master of sheet folding, but it has come upon me. Staying on top of things takes real effort... it takes a mindset.

We are the first generation of women that are expected to do it all: a successful carreer, an excellant wife, a ready lover, a great hostess, a good mother, a great cook, efficient shopper, financial manager, a dog walker, kitty litter scooper, trustworthy friend, a volunteer, and most of all a spotless housekeeper! (I am sure you can think of more). No wonder so many of us need anti-depressants!

While we are racing around our lives attempting to be all to everyone, the Mormons come to the door with their pamphlets on how to manage stress! I answered the door in my pyjamas, my nipples sticking out bra-less under my shirt to two middle aged men in suits... it was 10 am on a saturday morning, had they been in their early 20's I would have had only one question for them: are you allowed to masturbate? But for these gents, by nipples were probably enough.

Don't talk to me about stress... that, I know enough about. I think all mothers do and asking us for our time to visit isn't helping our stress levels. But I digress...

Making beds, loads of laundry, thinking about what to make for dinner while you are having breakfast is a multi-faceted world that is Mother. Its easy to become overwhelmed, these jobs go so unnoticed and sometimes it feels unappreciated... but the proof is in the pudding. Every effort that we put into staying on top of things, domestically, is time well spent! We are making Magic!!

For every missing sock we find its partner, for every speghetti stain we get out, for every dust bundle we sweep up we are investing into the lives of our loved ones. We are demonstrating the energy that is Love. We are changing the energy in our homes, we are lightening up our spaces, we are created order out of chaos, we are making Magic. We are being the spiritual leaders of our homes with the unscene workings that is domestication.

I have to remind myself of this everytime I feel resentfullness, exhaustion, despair, or depression trying to win its way over me. I have to change my thinking, turn it around, and embrace that I am doing the job that only I have been blessed with doing... caring for my family.

I remind myself that I am so blessed to have these gorgeous people in my life and it is such an honor to serve them.

And thus, domestication is not a talent one is born with, it is a skill that we open ourselves to learn. Embracing the glorious opportunity to be Mother.


  1. I love this one - I am going to try to start commenting instead of just creeping!


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